Oliver

Oh Oliver, I will miss you more than words can describe. I still remember the first time I laid my little nine-year old eyes on you. It was my ninth birthday party and you were the last present I opened - a big ol' box down in the basement. Thank you Aunt Donna for the best gift I have ever received. You were so darn cute but come on, a toy poodle? And silly me wanted to name you Salt, after our previous dog, Pepper. Nikki named you, as she was reading Oliver Twist at the time - later she also named my beloved Roxanne. 


You pulled me through a pretty trying childhood, Oliver, with the angry giant of an older sister, bossy older brother, and little sister whole stole everyone's attention. Not to mention the alcoholism, ahem. I felt pretty alone then but you were always there for me whenever I needed you, always more than willing to cuddle with me or at least sleep on my lap oh so comfortingly. You always seemed to know when I was having a bad day and would come give me some extra loving.

You have been loved and adored by many through the years. You were the cross country's team's "Mascot," and have been enjoyed by those at camp, track, the trap club, and Katie's tennis and softball events, not to mention the Boys Scouts of old and of course our large family. You are quite the ladies' man, Oliver, though apparently only middle-aged women. I remember the one time I was walking you near my college and some guys up on their porch told me how cute you are, then they asked what breed you are and I told them Toy Poodle, but not surprisingly so they told me how lame that is and how gay that it. Those IDIOTS.

You are the best dog I could have ever asked for. You were easy to train and so smart you are, even now in your extreme old age you have managed to keep you wits about you. I remember I taught you to lay and rollover in the same afternoon oh way back then. I'd have to say that's pretty impressive for a nine year old. They say chocolate is bad for a dog's heart, but you have eaten chocolate at least once a week your entire life but that's not what's holding you back, old man. Its the arthritis, cataracts, and deafness that's what's really troubling you. Oh how you love to lick the ice cream bowls... and end up with a sticky beard like you did last night. Despite how cute everyone says you are, I've only ever like one of you hair cuts. In fourteen years, I have only liked how your hair was cut once. Yeesh. Well, that makes since, because I usually had to leave that up to someone else for most of your life. Here's a little secret - I have never called you "Ollie," and I have never liked that people call you that. Your name is "Oliver" and you should be referred to as such.

I can't help but feel guilty for not taking better care of you. If only I could've protected you from the vicious attacks from the neighbors' stupid black lab and dalmation, at least you have far outlived them. Murphy deserved that 2x4 to the head for trying to kill you. Of course, you didn't help matters by trying to be tough like you were a 100 pound dog. Seriously, Oliver, you seven pounds soaking wet. It took you almost two years to finally tolerate Tucker, you tried to beat him up. You killed Katie's bunny - not that it needed much help as it was pretty neglected. You outlived your cousin Prancer by years and your uncle Pepper was too dumb to stay out of the road. Poor Tucker, that sweet puppy had terrible health issues. Somehow, with the rough life you have had, you made it this far, this long, and have been so loving and loyal the entire way. I was disappointed at first that you started to sleep in someone else's bed after I moved to college, but I 'm glad you finally branched out and started to like more people after ten years of sole dedication to me.

Last year when I had you in Buffalo with me you were in excellent shape, other than the worsening cataracts and hearing. You could actually lift up your leg to pee. But after summer camp, the slow descent into old age finally caught up with you. The last six months have been terribly exhausting with you, sir. I can't remember the last time you slept through the whole night or went an entire day without messing on the carpet. Though, I have suffered through these shenanigans because I love you too much to not want to you be in my life even for just a little bit longer. But now, good friend, the time has come for you to go to a special place and feel no more pain or fright and forever be at peace. If you could have told me, you might have wanted to be put out of your misery months ago but for my own selfishness I wouldn't have wanted to listen anyway. Two weeks ago when you fell down the stairs and cracked your head on the concrete, that was the last straw for me. You were laying there stunned and bleeding from the lip. I decided right there that that is no life for such a good friend of mine. I don't want you to suffer anymore. I have built you a beautiful oak Box and have picked out a lovely spot out in the pine grove in the field. I'm sure you would love it, if only you could have seen it for yourself.

Don't tell anyone, but I have spent more on Christmas presents for you than I have on anyone else. I kept your red sweater for way too long, with holes and everything, because it is the only one I have ever liked on you because it actually has sleeves. You never played fetch or had any favorite toys but I really miss the days when you would run around like a mad man and could still do all the many tricks I taught you to do. I'm still upset that you were rejected as the subject of my Behavior Modification class a year and a half ago. As hard as I try I don't think my effort to give you a proper burial will be enough to give you the respect that you deserve.

Now as you lay in my lap one final time and dream and twitch about, I am just so sad. I don't want it to happen, I don't want to take you to the vet tomorrow, but I do want you to be in peace. I want you to sleep as peacefully and as adorably as you do now, forever. Dammit Oliver, only you could break my stoicism like this. I don't think I will ever love a puppy like I have loved you. We grew up together. You ARE my childhood. 14 years, 1 month, and 8 days in my life; forever in my heart.

Goodbye Oliver
I will love you forever and always,
Adam
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